Did I tell you about how in the evening Heidi got the pitcher of water and cups, and stood outside the girls' tents so that they could all brush their teeth? I was just thinking about that the other day. The little things that happened during the day.
"Brother Billy" was always holding a cup, unless he was helping Pastor Terry with the boat. It was sort of like his signature!
More to add as I remember...
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Monday, October 12, 2009
My Autobiography (Written in 1999)
My mom sent me an autobiography I wrote in 1999 for one of my college classes. Lots has happened since then... but I would like to share it with you (well part of it). My next blog will hopefully be 1999 to the present. I think family history is interesting. I am currently working on a extended family tree. Disclaimer: Please remember as you read that is this is coming for my point of view and the actual reality can be slightly scewed given my life experiences up until now. If written today I might have definately reworded some things...
Note: On 10.13.09 I edited it so that the privacy of my family is not jepordized.
Thursday, December 02, 1999 8:51 PM
My Autobiography
I am Abby Moore. I am nineteen years old and just experiencing the ending years of adolescence. The sources I have used were a conversation with my mother and by using my own memories.
I was born at 3:20 a.m. on Sunday (Mother’s Day), May 11, 1980 in Monroe, Michigan. My mother had planned on marrying my biological father, but had separated with him while she was still pregnant with me. Some other unusual circumstances concerning my birth was that my original due date happened to be April 30th. But my mom was glad that I waited because I made her a mother on Mother’s Day, and that would always be very special to her. She did not even know she was in labor when she went to the hospital. She felt like she had butterfly’s flittering in her stomach. When my mom told my Aunt Sue how she was feeling my aunt said that she could be in labor so they went to the hospital around midnight and 3 hours later God blessed her with me, in her eyes the “prettiest little baby girl in the world.” She said she hardly had any pain. Another unusual thing that happened was that her amniotic sac didn’t break inside of her. It started coming out of her before bursting on the table. Then out I came! My mother said, “Praise the Lord a million times!!!!!!!!”
General information about where I have lived especially during adolescence would be first 902 East Eighth St., Monroe, MI - this was my grandpa’s house. We lived there until I was about 2 months old. Second place was in an apartment on Front St., Monroe, MI - my mom was working for Wismer & Becker Electrical Contractors at the Enrico Fermi Nuclear Power Plant in Newport, MI. We moved to this place when my mom went back to work after having me, we only stayed here about 2 months, during this time my mom met my dad, who is not my biological father. The third place was 1762 Steiner Rd., Monroe, MI - my dad, my mom, and I shared a home with a friend of my dad’s who built a very nice home and then his wife left him. As time went on and I was about 1 year old my parents decided that the environment was not too good for a child to be raised in, and decided to find a place closer to work. My dad and mom both worked at the Fermi. The fourth place was a very nice, quaint little place on a canal in Newport, MI. We only lived here until my dad got laid-off. The Fermi was almost completed and a lot of the contractors were leaving so my mom knew she was not too far behind him at getting laid-off also. That is when my dad moved up to the U.P (around November 1, 1981).
The fifth place was State Rd., Vulcan, MI - This was a log cabin house we rented from Dr. Mellon while he was in Florida for the winter. My dad moved out because by this time my parents both became Christians and knew it was not pleasing to God for them to live together until they were married (that was not going to happen until they got some things straightened out in their relationship. She said that she did not know if they had ever straightened everything out, but then she found out that she was pregnant with Sarah). My mom and I moved out in April 1982 when Doc Mellon came back to town. He was a very nice man and this was a great little house except this was when my mom learned what a wood tick is and would not go outside with me anymore. Sixth place was 713 Maple St., Norway, MI - this was a little apartment in a big white house. This is where we lived until my dad and mom got married on August 28th 1982. Seventh place was U.S. 2, Spread Eagle, WI -where I also eventually went to pre-kindergarten and kindergarten, until we had our house set up in Randville. I was in first grade when I moved to the eighth place: Randville/Iron Mountain -established in 1987 until present, where I spent all of my adolescents until college at Evangel University.
Living in my home in Michigan is my mom and dad, the man who raised me just like his own, and my sister and brother-who biologically are my half-siblings, but to me are a whole part of me. I am the oldest child in my home. My sister is seventeen and my brother is fifteen.
During my adolescents my dad was in his later 40s and early 50s. He has worked hard as being a mechanic and truck driver. He is not much of a “family” man and does not have a strong bond with my other siblings or me. Him and my mother have not always been happy together, but have continued their marriage because they know as Christians that God does not like divorce. This situation has also had considerable affect on my family. My mom, after finishing her babysitting career, went into working in the human resources department at the same company as my dad and also worked hard-leaving us children home with more responsibilities. This is when I developed more “motherly” instincts towards my sister and brother. I am close to my mother and have seen ways that we lean on each other for comfort in times that we were struggling through emotional difficulties.
My sister and I are very different in our personalities, which made us often clash. She is defensive and stronger willed than I am. We have also been able to compromise, though, in some areas, and she has been a good counselor when I needed a realistic answer, not an idealistic one.
My brother, who is four years younger than me, and I have had some bonding times, but I have to find areas that he can relate. My brother has had some problems with his behavior and A. D. D., which has affected his relationship with our family. Because I was more sensitive and less demanding I was easy prey to be picked on and yet I was considered the “perfect” child, even when my sister was always doing more around the house for the family in the area of chores. With our sheltered life in a small community and strict discipline we have had hard times and good times that have caused us to grow maturely and together.
I approximately entered biological puberty when I was eleven years old. This was earlier than most of my classmates my age. The experience was scary and a mark of growing up, but both my family and I handled it well; my mother helped me through it. I think I was more maturely ready for it compared to some others, although it probably had a negative effect to my self-esteem.
Any serious illnesses or injuries other than breaking my collar bone when I was six, my wrist in second grade, chicken pox, spinal meningitis, and febrile seizures until I was 10 years old I was pretty healthy. I have also had a lot of respiratory problems such as sinuses aching, headaches, sore throats, hard breathing, and coughing. I got my tonsils our in twelfth grade -two weeks before I graduated. The older I get the more some of the problems get better.
I did not like my image as I grew up during adolescents. I have always been heavier than most of the other people my age and that I hung around or I was not happy with myself. I have been shorter than I wish and I would like to be taller so that I could look older and mature. These areas have always been difficult for me. My adolescent years were a very hard time for me. My self-esteem was very low and I was often depressed because of it. Looking back, even if high school is not that far back, I should have spent more time enjoying life instead of wasting it in trying to make my life better.
Intellectually I was always average in my class. I made a 3.86 on my final report card and was sixth in my class of forty-eight. I was not naturally smart, but had to work hard at my grades in harder situations. I was always considered to have wisdom in life applications and did not always have stimulating ideas in the world of academics, although I did well in Algebra and other math areas. I liked math the most, because I could understand it and follow the procedures. I did not like Chemistry, because some of the aspects were too confusing for me. I have participated in Missionettes at church, a girls Bible program, Student Council at school, a team of leaders to make a difference in my school, and Band that have aided me intellectually. I always wanted to finish high school in the upper rank of my class and go to college. I have wanted to finish college with a high interest and knowledge of my career choice. I wanted to know how to be successful in life on earth and as a Christian in ministry.
My school was K-12 grade, 500 students, class D in rank, and only provided the basic needs and had a lack of college preparatory classes. It was a rural low income/middle class (predominantly) area with not much racial differences; white was the majority, a few Hispanic, Asian, Indian, and less than a couple of African American origins. Due to the size of my school, intellectually I was not always challenged very much, which has caused some difficulties in college now. I got my intellectual growth mostly from my family, friends, and church. I was influenced only as much as they expected me to think more intellectually.
I was brought up as a perfectionist and so I always tried to do well at all that I did. My disposition during adolescence was a perfectionist and very passive with people. I always had to try to please people and had to act the best ways I knew how. I did not have much of a temper. I did not yell when I was mad. I was relaxed, but yet cautious in life. I did not like to take risks. I always tried to be the peace -maker in the house. I was always considered to have a good attitude about life and enjoyed smiling and laughing. Mostly friendly and easily able to laugh at situations, some things bothered me more than other things and easily detected. My family always thought I was too nice to people and too sensitive about how others felt about me. My dad thought I was selfish and a brat. My whole family is different from each other, not as sensitive as me, but also perfectionist in some areas. My dad has a temper and very strong-willed, but also a perfectionist. My mom is a perfectionist and strong-willed, but also more sensitive about things. My sister has a temper and strong -willed, and easy going, but puts up guards with people and often keeps things inside. My brother has a hard time with people and often has to be the center of attention; he is also easy going, but puts up a guard and is hard to reach.
Activities such as the National Honor Society, Band, Student Council, S. A. D. D., church youth group and leadership in some of the classes, playing piano, and any of my other hobbies all contributed to my sense of self. Since Junior High I believe I have been more relaxed and strong -willed. I have become stronger in my self-worth and can take more responsibility, and have more leadership qualities. It has also been easier for me to become more stressed out, and I have more fears than I did then, but in other areas more relaxed.
Major growth issues for me psychologically/emotionally were meeting my biological father when I was in ninth grade, dealing with losses of loved ones either through death or moving away, and dealing with church growth and declining situations that effect the whole congregation. Other issues were responsibilities at home, my relationship with friends and family, and some other normal teen issues. My parents used an authoritarian style of parenting, but the older we got the more it became authoritative-a mix of both authoritarian and permissive. My relationship with my parents is not always good. My dad and I have often conflicted. My mother and I are close, but have had disagreements sometimes. My siblings have been hard on me, but are my friends, too. I love my family, even when we go through trials. I am also close to some of my aunts on my mother’s side. My Aunt Sherry, my mother’s younger sister, said “[Do not forget to mention] living with you all and how she used to sleep on my stomach at night or how I had to sleep holding a pillow for six months after you left, because I was so used to her sleeping with me, or how you couldn’t put pictures of me out at your new house in the UP, because it used to upset her because she missed me!” Recently I have become closer to my biological dad’s family and am constantly trying to build the relationship with them that I did not know growing up.
I have a hard time getting close to people besides my immediate family. I am friendly and do not have a hard time meeting new people, but I have a hard time with trust. I have a lot of friends, but very few are my “closest” friends. My “closest” friends have a heart for God and are willing to listen to my life issues. They also have shown strong trust in me and have given me encouragement to be who God wants me to be. I was only influenced negatively with my attitude when I spent a lot of time with them. Sometimes I needed just to be alone when we struggled with our personality differences. Positive influence came with our gifts rubbing off of each of us onto another. Many of my peers had respect for me because I returned to respect to them. I was often looked to for advice and got positive encouragement from those I helped.
Since I was little I always had this image of a perfect family and a fairy tale romance when I got older. I liked many guys who were nice, with a great personality, and sense of humor. It did not matter to me as much as other girls my age what they looked like on the outside. It all had to do with their heart. All my friends were in to dating, but I was not. I had male friends but that was all it was. I wanted to find the perfect man for me when God was ready for me and I did not want to go through all the dating hardships. When I was younger I was kind of shy around guys anyway. Guys did not start really being attracted to me until the summer after I graduated. Those guys were not my types, but were still my friends. I was satisfied with trying to make to college and to grow closer to God. I had a lot of hurts from my family and felt rejection by a lot of my peers, which made me hesitate in trying to pursue other “kinds” of relationships.
I was about one and a half years old when my parents became Christians. I continued to stay in the church they were converted in until now. I spent a lot of time at church. I became a true Christian when I was eight years old. I was water baptized when I was ten. I really found out how the Holy Spirit lives in me when I was fifteen. The church was like my second home. When I was old enough I taught many Sunday School classes for the younger children and helped out wherever needed. My family has always been in church whenever the doors where open. My parents made sure we were always at church no matter how hard it was at home. This influence has led me to want to become a Junior High Youth Pastor. I now help out with Youth Group whenever I am home. My strong stand on the truth of Jesus Christ is what leads me and keeps me going. Everything I have done growing up has influenced me in some way or another.
I have had a low self-esteem by the way my family has treated me, but I also have leadership skills because of their strong stands. I can give mature advice when needed, because of what my life was, and from observing other people and their lives. Erik Erikson’s theory of psychosocial development explained my life well in his stages. During the stages of school age, adolescence, and young adult my life was similar. I would probably use the psychoanalytic theory the least, because I believe that everyone thinks differently and it is hard to measure me in some of the common defense mechanisms and the constructs of the personality. I would have probably used Albert Bandura’s social cognitive theory, because it is interesting to know the results of observation of me and how my personality has developed similar to other models. Erikson studied other cultures and historical human figures. He saw human development as the interaction between genes and the environment surrounding in which we live (Dacey and Kenny. Adolescent Development. 51). Each of his eight stages marked a crisis that needed to be resolved before the person could go on. He believed the stages overlapped. It was said that his stages were a picture of the ideal, and that no one ever completed the stages perfectly (52). The school age stage between the ages of five and twelve was the stage of the industry versus inferiority crisis. Here the elementary children expanded from their family to their neighborhood. They try to please others and do not understand why things are necessary for their own good. During this stage it was hard for me to adventure out and meet new people, because I lived in a very small area and also I was close to my family. I was one to try to please the teacher and did not realize that being good was good for my own self, not just to receive the teacher’s appreciation. Some of this stage did overlap with the next stage of adolescence. The adolescence stage of Erikson’s theory, between the ages of eighteen and twenty-five, showed identity and repudiation versus identity confusion. The identity crisis usually was what caused adolescence to make major decisions about their identity, “a state in which one strives.”
I had a lot of trouble finding out who I really was. I had other people’s image of me, but I did not know my identity personally or what I was supposed to do in my life after high school. I had a hard time making decisions sometimes without someone’s help, which effected my actions in college. It was a big maturing time for me and was also carried on to my young adult years. Although I am in my beginning young adult years I am beginning to feel the stages of intimacy and solidarity versus isolation. I am have to learn how to relate to others, eventually my future mate, with my deepest hopes and fears in life and to accept another person’s need for intimacy in turn. This is hard when I am use to being alone and I have to learn to give up myself. To conclude, I would not like to go back to my adolescent years, but would have like to change them. I can only go on with my “stages” of life, only to build up who I am. My physical, cognitive, psychological, social, and spiritual development is normal and is unique to any other person my age. As Abigail Moore I am looking forward to the years ahead and happy to be able to use my past experiences to better myself and to help other adolescents go through life easier.
Note: On 10.13.09 I edited it so that the privacy of my family is not jepordized.
Thursday, December 02, 1999 8:51 PM
My Autobiography
I am Abby Moore. I am nineteen years old and just experiencing the ending years of adolescence. The sources I have used were a conversation with my mother and by using my own memories.
I was born at 3:20 a.m. on Sunday (Mother’s Day), May 11, 1980 in Monroe, Michigan. My mother had planned on marrying my biological father, but had separated with him while she was still pregnant with me. Some other unusual circumstances concerning my birth was that my original due date happened to be April 30th. But my mom was glad that I waited because I made her a mother on Mother’s Day, and that would always be very special to her. She did not even know she was in labor when she went to the hospital. She felt like she had butterfly’s flittering in her stomach. When my mom told my Aunt Sue how she was feeling my aunt said that she could be in labor so they went to the hospital around midnight and 3 hours later God blessed her with me, in her eyes the “prettiest little baby girl in the world.” She said she hardly had any pain. Another unusual thing that happened was that her amniotic sac didn’t break inside of her. It started coming out of her before bursting on the table. Then out I came! My mother said, “Praise the Lord a million times!!!!!!!!”
General information about where I have lived especially during adolescence would be first 902 East Eighth St., Monroe, MI - this was my grandpa’s house. We lived there until I was about 2 months old. Second place was in an apartment on Front St., Monroe, MI - my mom was working for Wismer & Becker Electrical Contractors at the Enrico Fermi Nuclear Power Plant in Newport, MI. We moved to this place when my mom went back to work after having me, we only stayed here about 2 months, during this time my mom met my dad, who is not my biological father. The third place was 1762 Steiner Rd., Monroe, MI - my dad, my mom, and I shared a home with a friend of my dad’s who built a very nice home and then his wife left him. As time went on and I was about 1 year old my parents decided that the environment was not too good for a child to be raised in, and decided to find a place closer to work. My dad and mom both worked at the Fermi. The fourth place was a very nice, quaint little place on a canal in Newport, MI. We only lived here until my dad got laid-off. The Fermi was almost completed and a lot of the contractors were leaving so my mom knew she was not too far behind him at getting laid-off also. That is when my dad moved up to the U.P (around November 1, 1981).
The fifth place was State Rd., Vulcan, MI - This was a log cabin house we rented from Dr. Mellon while he was in Florida for the winter. My dad moved out because by this time my parents both became Christians and knew it was not pleasing to God for them to live together until they were married (that was not going to happen until they got some things straightened out in their relationship. She said that she did not know if they had ever straightened everything out, but then she found out that she was pregnant with Sarah). My mom and I moved out in April 1982 when Doc Mellon came back to town. He was a very nice man and this was a great little house except this was when my mom learned what a wood tick is and would not go outside with me anymore. Sixth place was 713 Maple St., Norway, MI - this was a little apartment in a big white house. This is where we lived until my dad and mom got married on August 28th 1982. Seventh place was U.S. 2, Spread Eagle, WI -where I also eventually went to pre-kindergarten and kindergarten, until we had our house set up in Randville. I was in first grade when I moved to the eighth place: Randville/Iron Mountain -established in 1987 until present, where I spent all of my adolescents until college at Evangel University.
Living in my home in Michigan is my mom and dad, the man who raised me just like his own, and my sister and brother-who biologically are my half-siblings, but to me are a whole part of me. I am the oldest child in my home. My sister is seventeen and my brother is fifteen.
During my adolescents my dad was in his later 40s and early 50s. He has worked hard as being a mechanic and truck driver. He is not much of a “family” man and does not have a strong bond with my other siblings or me. Him and my mother have not always been happy together, but have continued their marriage because they know as Christians that God does not like divorce. This situation has also had considerable affect on my family. My mom, after finishing her babysitting career, went into working in the human resources department at the same company as my dad and also worked hard-leaving us children home with more responsibilities. This is when I developed more “motherly” instincts towards my sister and brother. I am close to my mother and have seen ways that we lean on each other for comfort in times that we were struggling through emotional difficulties.
My sister and I are very different in our personalities, which made us often clash. She is defensive and stronger willed than I am. We have also been able to compromise, though, in some areas, and she has been a good counselor when I needed a realistic answer, not an idealistic one.
My brother, who is four years younger than me, and I have had some bonding times, but I have to find areas that he can relate. My brother has had some problems with his behavior and A. D. D., which has affected his relationship with our family. Because I was more sensitive and less demanding I was easy prey to be picked on and yet I was considered the “perfect” child, even when my sister was always doing more around the house for the family in the area of chores. With our sheltered life in a small community and strict discipline we have had hard times and good times that have caused us to grow maturely and together.
I approximately entered biological puberty when I was eleven years old. This was earlier than most of my classmates my age. The experience was scary and a mark of growing up, but both my family and I handled it well; my mother helped me through it. I think I was more maturely ready for it compared to some others, although it probably had a negative effect to my self-esteem.
Any serious illnesses or injuries other than breaking my collar bone when I was six, my wrist in second grade, chicken pox, spinal meningitis, and febrile seizures until I was 10 years old I was pretty healthy. I have also had a lot of respiratory problems such as sinuses aching, headaches, sore throats, hard breathing, and coughing. I got my tonsils our in twelfth grade -two weeks before I graduated. The older I get the more some of the problems get better.
I did not like my image as I grew up during adolescents. I have always been heavier than most of the other people my age and that I hung around or I was not happy with myself. I have been shorter than I wish and I would like to be taller so that I could look older and mature. These areas have always been difficult for me. My adolescent years were a very hard time for me. My self-esteem was very low and I was often depressed because of it. Looking back, even if high school is not that far back, I should have spent more time enjoying life instead of wasting it in trying to make my life better.
Intellectually I was always average in my class. I made a 3.86 on my final report card and was sixth in my class of forty-eight. I was not naturally smart, but had to work hard at my grades in harder situations. I was always considered to have wisdom in life applications and did not always have stimulating ideas in the world of academics, although I did well in Algebra and other math areas. I liked math the most, because I could understand it and follow the procedures. I did not like Chemistry, because some of the aspects were too confusing for me. I have participated in Missionettes at church, a girls Bible program, Student Council at school, a team of leaders to make a difference in my school, and Band that have aided me intellectually. I always wanted to finish high school in the upper rank of my class and go to college. I have wanted to finish college with a high interest and knowledge of my career choice. I wanted to know how to be successful in life on earth and as a Christian in ministry.
My school was K-12 grade, 500 students, class D in rank, and only provided the basic needs and had a lack of college preparatory classes. It was a rural low income/middle class (predominantly) area with not much racial differences; white was the majority, a few Hispanic, Asian, Indian, and less than a couple of African American origins. Due to the size of my school, intellectually I was not always challenged very much, which has caused some difficulties in college now. I got my intellectual growth mostly from my family, friends, and church. I was influenced only as much as they expected me to think more intellectually.
I was brought up as a perfectionist and so I always tried to do well at all that I did. My disposition during adolescence was a perfectionist and very passive with people. I always had to try to please people and had to act the best ways I knew how. I did not have much of a temper. I did not yell when I was mad. I was relaxed, but yet cautious in life. I did not like to take risks. I always tried to be the peace -maker in the house. I was always considered to have a good attitude about life and enjoyed smiling and laughing. Mostly friendly and easily able to laugh at situations, some things bothered me more than other things and easily detected. My family always thought I was too nice to people and too sensitive about how others felt about me. My dad thought I was selfish and a brat. My whole family is different from each other, not as sensitive as me, but also perfectionist in some areas. My dad has a temper and very strong-willed, but also a perfectionist. My mom is a perfectionist and strong-willed, but also more sensitive about things. My sister has a temper and strong -willed, and easy going, but puts up guards with people and often keeps things inside. My brother has a hard time with people and often has to be the center of attention; he is also easy going, but puts up a guard and is hard to reach.
Activities such as the National Honor Society, Band, Student Council, S. A. D. D., church youth group and leadership in some of the classes, playing piano, and any of my other hobbies all contributed to my sense of self. Since Junior High I believe I have been more relaxed and strong -willed. I have become stronger in my self-worth and can take more responsibility, and have more leadership qualities. It has also been easier for me to become more stressed out, and I have more fears than I did then, but in other areas more relaxed.
Major growth issues for me psychologically/emotionally were meeting my biological father when I was in ninth grade, dealing with losses of loved ones either through death or moving away, and dealing with church growth and declining situations that effect the whole congregation. Other issues were responsibilities at home, my relationship with friends and family, and some other normal teen issues. My parents used an authoritarian style of parenting, but the older we got the more it became authoritative-a mix of both authoritarian and permissive. My relationship with my parents is not always good. My dad and I have often conflicted. My mother and I are close, but have had disagreements sometimes. My siblings have been hard on me, but are my friends, too. I love my family, even when we go through trials. I am also close to some of my aunts on my mother’s side. My Aunt Sherry, my mother’s younger sister, said “[Do not forget to mention] living with you all and how she used to sleep on my stomach at night or how I had to sleep holding a pillow for six months after you left, because I was so used to her sleeping with me, or how you couldn’t put pictures of me out at your new house in the UP, because it used to upset her because she missed me!” Recently I have become closer to my biological dad’s family and am constantly trying to build the relationship with them that I did not know growing up.
I have a hard time getting close to people besides my immediate family. I am friendly and do not have a hard time meeting new people, but I have a hard time with trust. I have a lot of friends, but very few are my “closest” friends. My “closest” friends have a heart for God and are willing to listen to my life issues. They also have shown strong trust in me and have given me encouragement to be who God wants me to be. I was only influenced negatively with my attitude when I spent a lot of time with them. Sometimes I needed just to be alone when we struggled with our personality differences. Positive influence came with our gifts rubbing off of each of us onto another. Many of my peers had respect for me because I returned to respect to them. I was often looked to for advice and got positive encouragement from those I helped.
Since I was little I always had this image of a perfect family and a fairy tale romance when I got older. I liked many guys who were nice, with a great personality, and sense of humor. It did not matter to me as much as other girls my age what they looked like on the outside. It all had to do with their heart. All my friends were in to dating, but I was not. I had male friends but that was all it was. I wanted to find the perfect man for me when God was ready for me and I did not want to go through all the dating hardships. When I was younger I was kind of shy around guys anyway. Guys did not start really being attracted to me until the summer after I graduated. Those guys were not my types, but were still my friends. I was satisfied with trying to make to college and to grow closer to God. I had a lot of hurts from my family and felt rejection by a lot of my peers, which made me hesitate in trying to pursue other “kinds” of relationships.
I was about one and a half years old when my parents became Christians. I continued to stay in the church they were converted in until now. I spent a lot of time at church. I became a true Christian when I was eight years old. I was water baptized when I was ten. I really found out how the Holy Spirit lives in me when I was fifteen. The church was like my second home. When I was old enough I taught many Sunday School classes for the younger children and helped out wherever needed. My family has always been in church whenever the doors where open. My parents made sure we were always at church no matter how hard it was at home. This influence has led me to want to become a Junior High Youth Pastor. I now help out with Youth Group whenever I am home. My strong stand on the truth of Jesus Christ is what leads me and keeps me going. Everything I have done growing up has influenced me in some way or another.
I have had a low self-esteem by the way my family has treated me, but I also have leadership skills because of their strong stands. I can give mature advice when needed, because of what my life was, and from observing other people and their lives. Erik Erikson’s theory of psychosocial development explained my life well in his stages. During the stages of school age, adolescence, and young adult my life was similar. I would probably use the psychoanalytic theory the least, because I believe that everyone thinks differently and it is hard to measure me in some of the common defense mechanisms and the constructs of the personality. I would have probably used Albert Bandura’s social cognitive theory, because it is interesting to know the results of observation of me and how my personality has developed similar to other models. Erikson studied other cultures and historical human figures. He saw human development as the interaction between genes and the environment surrounding in which we live (Dacey and Kenny. Adolescent Development. 51). Each of his eight stages marked a crisis that needed to be resolved before the person could go on. He believed the stages overlapped. It was said that his stages were a picture of the ideal, and that no one ever completed the stages perfectly (52). The school age stage between the ages of five and twelve was the stage of the industry versus inferiority crisis. Here the elementary children expanded from their family to their neighborhood. They try to please others and do not understand why things are necessary for their own good. During this stage it was hard for me to adventure out and meet new people, because I lived in a very small area and also I was close to my family. I was one to try to please the teacher and did not realize that being good was good for my own self, not just to receive the teacher’s appreciation. Some of this stage did overlap with the next stage of adolescence. The adolescence stage of Erikson’s theory, between the ages of eighteen and twenty-five, showed identity and repudiation versus identity confusion. The identity crisis usually was what caused adolescence to make major decisions about their identity, “a state in which one strives.”
I had a lot of trouble finding out who I really was. I had other people’s image of me, but I did not know my identity personally or what I was supposed to do in my life after high school. I had a hard time making decisions sometimes without someone’s help, which effected my actions in college. It was a big maturing time for me and was also carried on to my young adult years. Although I am in my beginning young adult years I am beginning to feel the stages of intimacy and solidarity versus isolation. I am have to learn how to relate to others, eventually my future mate, with my deepest hopes and fears in life and to accept another person’s need for intimacy in turn. This is hard when I am use to being alone and I have to learn to give up myself. To conclude, I would not like to go back to my adolescent years, but would have like to change them. I can only go on with my “stages” of life, only to build up who I am. My physical, cognitive, psychological, social, and spiritual development is normal and is unique to any other person my age. As Abigail Moore I am looking forward to the years ahead and happy to be able to use my past experiences to better myself and to help other adolescents go through life easier.
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